Harry Potter and the Order of the Mushroom
by Chilibob
Summary: The Order of the Pheonix decide to save people from mushrooms instead of evil dudes! Heh heh! this should be good...
1. This Chapter is Nameless!

Harry Potter and the Order of the Mushroom

Once upon a time a boy named Harry Potter walked into his Godfathers house. He went into the Kitchen to get himself some Flour so he could put it in his pants.

"Mushroom's it is then!" said Sirius

"What about mushroom's?" asked Harry

"Well Harry my boy. Me and the order of the Phoenix have decided that fighting Voldemort and his supporters is to dangerous for us" said Mr. Weasley "So we are renaming our "club" the order of the Mushroom and we will destroy all that is mushroomy and bad tasting! Everyone thinks it's a better idea except Dumbledore"

"But love Mushroom's" Dumbledore whined "Why can't we fight broccoli?"

"I like broccoli! Dumbledore go to your room!" yelled Sirius

"You guys are messed up! I'm staying out of this year's adventure!" said Harry he took the flour and went to play with his makeup. On the way to his room he tripped and fell down the stairs because nobody like's him.

"Come my loyal associates," said Sirius "Fallow me and I shall lead you against the evil of mushroom's" So everyone lined up behind Sirius. They all started to chant like Indians. Sirius led them out the door and to the grocery store.

"Sirius! Since when are you the leader?" said Snape "Yeah!" said everybody

"You can't be the leader! You'll be arrested for murder you jerk," yelled Mrs. Weasley

Dumbledore jumped out of a basket of strawberry's and yelled "Sirius! GO TO YOUR ROOM!"

Sirius mumbled something angrily and went home to his room


	2. The Phone Call

The Phone Call

The rest of them made there way to the mushroom isle. On there way there they passed a guy named Murphy. Murphy stared at them and went to the manager.

"There's a bunch of weirdo's in the mushroom isle!" Murphy said to the Manager who was named Harold.

"Yeah. I see a lot of weirdo's in the mushroom isle. Said Harold. He then went to poison the bean sprouts with aspartame "heehaw" he said

Meanwhile Sirius was in his room pouting. He decided to call Harry's friend Hermione and complain to her about his day.

"Who is it? What do you want with me?" said Hermione's voice

"It's Sirius Black," said Sirius

"ARG!" yelled Hermione "The mass murder! What do you want with me? I didn't do it! I swear! Do you want me to kill Harry? I will! I will! Just don't hurt me! Please don't hurt me" she started to cry pathetically.

"Ummm…Hermione…I'm innocent remember?" said Sirius

"Oh yeah! Well what do you want? Wait let me guess: The Order of the phoenix Changed there name to the Order of the Mushroom and went off to destroy all mushrooms but they wouldn't let you be the leader because you are wanted by the cops for murder so Dumbledore sent you to your room so you sat in your room pouting and decided to call me and I forgot you were innocent so I freaked out And you reminded me you were innocent so I told you all about you're day and now you're a bit confused. Am I Right?"

"Yeah! Wow! That was a very long sentence! I love long sentences!" said Sirius adoringly "Well that's all I wanted to say. Buh-bye!" He hanged up " What a great girl!"


	3. The Fierce Battle

The Fierce Battle

Meanwhile the Order of the Mushroom was having a fierce battle against the mushrooms. It was a hard battle but they finally killed all the mushrooms. Only five people, including Dumbledore, were injured enough to be crippled for life. They went back to the black house.

"Well!" said Mr. Weasley who was the least badly injured having only three cut's, a black eye, and a broken nose "That was easier than I thought it would be! Tomorrow we attack the mushroom's farm's!"

"Hurray!" Yelled everybody except Sirius.

"I HATE YOU ALL!" he punched Dumbledore and stomped up to his room.

"Well that wasn't very nice! He hurt my feelings!" said Dumbledore but since nobody liked Dumbledore they all ignored him and went on celebrating.

"I HATE YOU ALL!" Said Dumbledore and he punched Harry and stomped up to his room.

"So much for staying out of this one," said Harry. He then joined the Order of the Mushroom and began to party with his comrades.


	4. Chapter 4

The Revenge 

The next morning Sirius woke up before everyone else to get his revenge on those who had kicked him out of the only sociable thing he had done in a very long time. Nobody does that and gets away with it. He needed the perfect revenge.

He grabbed a banana and sneaked into Mr. Weasley room. He shoved the banana into Mr. Weasley's mouth and laughed as he choked. Mr. Weasley took the banana out of his mouth and hit Sirius in the head with it. He then passed out dead.

"Oopsies." Said Sirius innocently as if he were innocent. He then ran downstairs to eat breakfast.

Since Mr. Weasley was only temporarily dead he soon came down for breakfast. But first he beat the yogurt out of Sirius who was 58 percent yogurt.

When everybody was done fighting they all sat down at the table to eat breakfast.

"Dad?" said Ron "Can I join the Order of the Mushroom?"

"You'll have to audition." Answered Mr. Weasley.

"How?" asked Ron who was surprised cuz usually he couldn't join anything.

"You get up in front of everyone and sing a song. If the judges think youre good you'll move on to the next round! Really! You should at least watch the show and figure out what to do before you come auditioning." Said Mr. Weasley.

"Yeah… Sure." Said Ron. He then stood up in front of everyone and sang toxic by Britney Spears.

"AAAGGGGHHHH!" screamed various people. Everybody covered their ears and some even ran away from the house screaming their poor heads off. Dumbledore dropped dead. But that's ok cuz nobody likes Dumbledore.

Sirius saved the day by grabbing a chunk of cement and beating Ron senseless with it.

"Jesus lord almighty!" screeched Mr. Weasley "Not only can't you be in the order, but I am kicking you out of the house!" He then kicked Ron out of the house.

Ron then roamed through the lands looking for a new home. He was adopted by a family of wild graham crackers.


End file.
